Quantcast
Showing posts with label body image. Show all posts
Showing posts with label body image. Show all posts

Thursday, June 18, 2020

Big Summer by Jennifer Weiner

I'll confess that I had no plans to read this book until I listened to a podcast where Jennifer Weiner was interviewed about this novel and why she wrote it. Then it was "sign me up!" I am surprised at how quickly I read it. A day off, a late night, and waiting for an A/C repairman had me reading it--and quite frankly it hit all the right spots for my reading appetite. 

Daphne is an influencer-someone who uses Instagram to promote products and a lifestyle. Her niche as an influencer comes from her large size--and instead of hiding it, celebrating it in everything she does. This hasn't come easy, as Daphne has suffered from low self-esteem for years because of her size. 

Six years after ditching her "best friend" Drue Cavanaugh, Drue finds Daphne and asks her to be in her upcoming wedding on Cape Cod. Daphne hasn't seen Drue since the night Drue set her up as a pity date and Daphne found out. Their relationship is super complicated for Daphne-she's well aware Drue is not a nice person. Not at all. She uses people, drops them, makes fun of them, and manipulates everyone around her. She's done that to Daphne since 6th grade. Yet Daphne just can't get over how good she feels when Drue is behaving and treating her like she's the most important person in the world. It's a really messed up relationship! 

Daphne decides to accept Drue's plea--mostly because Drue says she's changed for the better, and has no friends she can ask to be in her super deluxe, big deal wedding. Arriving at Cape Cod the day before the wedding, it's clear this is going to be a big deal--and Daphne could benefit from the exposure and grow her Instagram followers (and make more money). 

Cape Cod, high end wedding...what could go wrong? Oh boy, do things go wrong. Horribly wrong. I can't tell you, because it's a major spoiler! You've got to read the book and find out. 

I so enjoyed this book. It really digs deep into how we treat people, how social media can make or destroy a person, and how things we did years ago can come back to haunt us. It's also about loving yourself enough to walk away from people who don't value you. 

This is the second summer book I've read that takes place on Cape Cod. I guess this is the new summer book setting. I'm fine with it--Cape Cod is on my list of places to see. These books just confirm that yes, I really do want to visit. 

Rating:  5/6 for a thoroughly enjoyable novel with some darker elements thrown in--you'll find Daphne and Drue's friendship baffling and compelling. 

Available in hardcover, ebook, and audio. 

Tuesday, April 12, 2016

13 Ways of Looking at a Fat Girl by Mona Awad

This was a tough book to get through.  Not because of the writing, but because of the self-loathing that the main character, Elizabeth, carries throughout each story within the story.  13 Ways of Looking at a Fat Girl is pretty brutal in the many ways women look at themselves, and are seen by others, based on their weight.  There was a time when being thin was an indication of being poor, and being plump was a sign of a good life.  In today's world, with an all-time high level of unhealthy eating habits and obesity, the criticism is so harsh against anyone who isn't a healthy weight, that it permeates our thinking and harms our vision of ourselves.  

Beth, Elizabeth, Liz...all one person, seen through her teen years and into her late 20's as she is an overweight teen struggling to find self worth and love by letting men use her for comfort (while loathing her size), to being so self-conscious that she can't send a full length photo to men she meets online for fear of them seeing how she looks.  Finally, Elizabeth meets a man online who loves her for who she is, but this is jeopardized at she begins to lose weight and becomes trapped in a cycle of hunger, exercise, and constant comparisons of herself to other women.  Being surrounded by women of all sizes, who all have a self-consciousness about food and appearance, and not only are judged by men, but judge each other.  The episodes where Elizabeth tries on dresses in stores hit close to home.  The bad lighting, the attendant constantly knocking on the door to see if everything's okay...the clothing never fitting and the only size available is one that will never fit.  That feeling of just wanting to give up and wear t-shirts and sweatpants because nothing looks right or fits at all.  We've all been there.  

It doesn't matter if you have been heavy all your life, or if you've been on the vicious diet cycle of thin, heavy, thin, heavy.  For me, I was always thin for most of my life (my legs were referred to as chicken legs) and I never appreciated what I looked like--there was always someone thinner. I was always the sister with the boobs, and I was always the "healthy looking" one.  I look at pictures, and I can't believe I didn't see myself in a positive light; that I always felt less than, somehow.   I didn't ever try crazy diets or watch what I ate--I was lucky.  But that isn't the case any longer; years of stress, grief over losing loved ones, and being unhappy with parts of my life have combined with growing older and packing on the pounds.  I think my younger self would be shocked at the change in me.  Self-loathing is an easy trap to fall into; and it can rule your life, as it does Elizabeth's.  

I saw snippets about this book that said it was humorous, so that's what I expected--a bit of self-deprecating humor and a lovable character I could laugh and commiserate with on the subject of weight.  I was wrong.  Elizabeth was a painful character, and I didn't find any humor in her struggle.  I guess it depends on the reader, and life experience, on how this will effect your view of Elizabeth's story.  If anything, it did point out some painful realizations:  comparing myself to everyone else, treating food as an enemy, and my underlying unhappiness at how I look and feel are detrimental to my self-confidence and peace. I can't look back, but can only look forward.  

I think this novel would be an excellent book club discussion book, and certainly something I would recommend for late teens and early twenties young ladies.  It is brutal, honest, painful, and gut wrenching.  

Thank you to Penguin Random House for a review copy.  

Rating:  8/10 for a powerful look at one woman's struggle to love herself in a world that has a harsh opinion on how we look.  

Available in paperback and e-book.